life is innately not what you do but how you do it hence how you live. I watched a movie on ktn over the Christmas holidays and it was about ( i forget the name) some 18th century family that couldn't die coz they apparently drunk from a spring in some enchanted forest. As fate would have it , the 100 year old teenager,fell madly in love with a girl and wanted her to drink from the fountain so that she doesnt kufa also and they can literally live happily ever after, shock! the chic refused! why? she discovered the secret in life is not not dying (knowhatimean) its is not living! and with that, i wanna share with you lyrics from a very powerful song, it is by point of grace, called how you live(turn up the music) i hope it speaks to you as it did me....shalom!
Wake up to the sunlight
With your windows open
Don't hold in your anger or leave things unspoken
Wear your red dress
Use your good dishes
Make a big mess and make lots of wishes
Have what you want
But want what you have
And don't spend your life lookin' back
Chorus:
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
You won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
Cuz it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
Verse 2:
So go to the ballgames
And go to the ballet
And go see your folks more than just on the holidays
Kiss all your children
Dance with your wife
Tell your husband you love him every night
Don't run from the truth
'Cause you can't get away
Just face it and you'll be okay
Chorus:
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
You won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
Bridge:
Oh wherever you are and wherever you've been
Now is the time to begin
Verse 3:
So give to the needy
And pray for the grieving
E'en when you don't think that you can
'Cause all that you do is bound to come back to you
So think of your fellow man
Make peace with God and make peace with yourself
'Cause in the end there's nobody else
Chorus
Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
Thursday, 24 January 2008
nolens volens
happy new year mi maties! hope your keeping well. you will excuse me if i don't get into the political scenario of the year, am sure the dailies and the international media have milked that baby dry, mine is to usher in a new existence of myself, a new face, a new era and a new time
Wonder what the heading means? its Latin for unwilling or willing and that is my theme for 2008.
Why?
Coz face it, stuff happens in our lives whether we want them to or not. however i am currently reading Rhonda Bryne's "the secret" that begs to differ.None the less the law of God rules so i'll go with that for a while...
nolens volens we were all prisoners in our own homes as odm supporters toughed it out and we watched in shock and horror as innocent kenyans suffered. nolens volens i was sick during the "new year" and couldn't go to hospital hence,have a very melancolic point of view of that time, nolens volens my sister and i have grown apart
I come from a family of many women, drama very much included but there was one woman i became very attached to, my immediate elder sister. Catalysed by our two year age difference, i grew up knowing that she was my best friend and she was and will always be regardless of this ridiculous pall that seems to have fogged our otherwise loving relationship
I have a flaw of falling in love with those i care about and believing , rather vehemantly, that it is indeed my sovereign duty to take care of them especially when i think (important to note that it is a self inflicted resolution) they are "neshing". But you see human nature doesn't work like that, people are , afterall, firstly single then part of a commune. Regardless of the many trials we have achieved in the past, i forgot this year that she is, nolens volens , her. And i can't change her, and i cant make her see things from my point of view because , well, they arent hers.
So we had this big fight, pride pre-destining us to not see each others point of view but i was humbled by Joyce's Meyers teaching when she said , "you know what.. we can't get offended all the time when stuff doesn't go our way. sometimes no matter what you do or say,the other party will never look through your glass and see your reflection. All that matters is what God says about you." So am taking this season to learn what God is saying about me,more so my flaws. I have been branded an over bearing, self centered cow enough times to look into that mirror and see what i can do about the image bouncing back.
Coz like it or not, sometimes you just have to let it go so that it can come to you( if at all) and that my dear is my first post of 2008.
Let God be true and every man a liar!
Wonder what the heading means? its Latin for unwilling or willing and that is my theme for 2008.
Why?
Coz face it, stuff happens in our lives whether we want them to or not. however i am currently reading Rhonda Bryne's "the secret" that begs to differ.None the less the law of God rules so i'll go with that for a while...
nolens volens we were all prisoners in our own homes as odm supporters toughed it out and we watched in shock and horror as innocent kenyans suffered. nolens volens i was sick during the "new year" and couldn't go to hospital hence,have a very melancolic point of view of that time, nolens volens my sister and i have grown apart
I come from a family of many women, drama very much included but there was one woman i became very attached to, my immediate elder sister. Catalysed by our two year age difference, i grew up knowing that she was my best friend and she was and will always be regardless of this ridiculous pall that seems to have fogged our otherwise loving relationship
I have a flaw of falling in love with those i care about and believing , rather vehemantly, that it is indeed my sovereign duty to take care of them especially when i think (important to note that it is a self inflicted resolution) they are "neshing". But you see human nature doesn't work like that, people are , afterall, firstly single then part of a commune. Regardless of the many trials we have achieved in the past, i forgot this year that she is, nolens volens , her. And i can't change her, and i cant make her see things from my point of view because , well, they arent hers.
So we had this big fight, pride pre-destining us to not see each others point of view but i was humbled by Joyce's Meyers teaching when she said , "you know what.. we can't get offended all the time when stuff doesn't go our way. sometimes no matter what you do or say,the other party will never look through your glass and see your reflection. All that matters is what God says about you." So am taking this season to learn what God is saying about me,more so my flaws. I have been branded an over bearing, self centered cow enough times to look into that mirror and see what i can do about the image bouncing back.
Coz like it or not, sometimes you just have to let it go so that it can come to you( if at all) and that my dear is my first post of 2008.
Let God be true and every man a liar!
Thursday, 29 November 2007
Finding Neemo, your lost key, God and yourself
So am in the mat in the morning,headed towards work.Its a typical setting; mat has loud music, this time, complimented by a DVD player so I get to atleast watch the racket and not imagine the lil punks singing at the bottom of my ear lope.
The mat hasnt't even moved a yard when this quirk seated on the window seat (the one behind the dere) starts chanting and mumbling.
At first I thought, "crunk has gone cultic these days" but when the noise didnt cease, i sort to fish it out. It was some lejo man ( you know the sect:jolejo a.k.a dini ya roho...) any hoo, he was wielding a two inch wooden sword on his left arm, complete with studs (read:thumb tucks) and a string of beads on circling his right hand. So, as he graced us with his public piety, we cringed and just watched in disbelief as the Kenyan sought God, in a mat, in the morning.
Made me wonder how many things people do in order to "find" God. Some have completely given up on the chase and only view Him as an obstacle to their otherwise "unbound" life. Others, get saved, like me..then later discover that that buzz you had when you rushed for the altar call is not present when you are intoxicated at the office party and have some dudes hand up or down your dress....
Others create their own religion to conform to their own sordid reality i.e Ron Hubbard's scientology and Kina House of Yahweh...not forgetten the King of Cults the free mason's and Marlyn Manson ( ai am sorry, church of Satan? i don't think so!)
My prayer everyday is that the deeper I discover self an ultimately actualisation, the more I will find Him in a perfect state where no sword, philosophy, pop culture or condemnation is needed. Just total peace, total understanding and above all, total love
my two cents in the slot
Peace!
The mat hasnt't even moved a yard when this quirk seated on the window seat (the one behind the dere) starts chanting and mumbling.
At first I thought, "crunk has gone cultic these days" but when the noise didnt cease, i sort to fish it out. It was some lejo man ( you know the sect:jolejo a.k.a dini ya roho...) any hoo, he was wielding a two inch wooden sword on his left arm, complete with studs (read:thumb tucks) and a string of beads on circling his right hand. So, as he graced us with his public piety, we cringed and just watched in disbelief as the Kenyan sought God, in a mat, in the morning.
Made me wonder how many things people do in order to "find" God. Some have completely given up on the chase and only view Him as an obstacle to their otherwise "unbound" life. Others, get saved, like me..then later discover that that buzz you had when you rushed for the altar call is not present when you are intoxicated at the office party and have some dudes hand up or down your dress....
Others create their own religion to conform to their own sordid reality i.e Ron Hubbard's scientology and Kina House of Yahweh...not forgetten the King of Cults the free mason's and Marlyn Manson ( ai am sorry, church of Satan? i don't think so!)
My prayer everyday is that the deeper I discover self an ultimately actualisation, the more I will find Him in a perfect state where no sword, philosophy, pop culture or condemnation is needed. Just total peace, total understanding and above all, total love
my two cents in the slot
Peace!
Wednesday, 7 November 2007
Happy Birthday to me
So today i turn 25
I woke up dead beat because last night i was combing through the hawkers market desperately looking for a nice top for my birthday. Off course i didn't find any so i opted for Tuskys ( does that name just annoy you especially when the vision of that silver toothed guy flashes before you) anyhoo
. So am at Tuskys right, they have this wide range of Enka Rasha rejects that look as bad and faded as the clothes from the street. I decide to go all girly ( only 25 once right) so i go to the skirts section. I find the one i want, i go to the changing room its like ten sizes too big. These dweebs fold skirts twice to make them look like a size 10 but they are actually a size 16. So i go through 20 minutes of these plus size discoveries until i decide , to hell, better the devil you know...i buy a top that can match with my jeans in the digs.
I get home around 9:30, shower and do my toe nails...Scarlet red..nice...thing is, nail polish takes forever to dry and am sleepy so i think to hell and jump under the covers , smudge and all.
I wake up at 5:50 a.m on November 8th 2007 feeling like shit lemme tell you today has been the most awful morning i have had in a long time . And the more i remind myself of the jubilation supposed to be followed by this festive event the angrier i get, i mean it was raining...how?..i have heels on with gold jewelery and a very Small top but noooooo the heavens had to open their flood gates which did nothing for My asthma. I hurriedly scamper to the bus stop thinking, if am early i can get the train and save on bus fare plus traffic. Luckily i make it on time to join the already swelling crowd at the terminal. God then looked down, saw a small stain on my body that perhaps i had missed during my hurried cold shower and decides to fix it...with a downpour of icy rain!
shit!
I ingia a mat in a rash to avoid wetness and asthma. The mat soon leaves even before the train so i reason...yeah! i have saved time...shock on the sister, the train arrives like 5 minutes later and passes me as i am huddled in this stinky metal carriage between school going children and noisy mothers!
I was stuck in traffic from 7a.m to 8:30
Double shit!
By the time i got to Town i was six by products of mad. Still got rained on again...my boyfriend calls me up to wish me Happy birthday and because of my already brooding mood am thinking "whatever"
Get to work every ones assuming you, i log onto messenger no one is on, my heels are killing me, am tired, bila psyche and its only 10 a.m!!!
Triple shit!
POINT: Theres too much pressure put on one day...valentines, birthdays, anniversaries...i think the real moments are the ones not marked in the calendars but those marked by their random awesomeness...wacha hii siku iishe so that we can have many many happy birthdays from tomorrow till November 8th next year!
I woke up dead beat because last night i was combing through the hawkers market desperately looking for a nice top for my birthday. Off course i didn't find any so i opted for Tuskys ( does that name just annoy you especially when the vision of that silver toothed guy flashes before you) anyhoo
. So am at Tuskys right, they have this wide range of Enka Rasha rejects that look as bad and faded as the clothes from the street. I decide to go all girly ( only 25 once right) so i go to the skirts section. I find the one i want, i go to the changing room its like ten sizes too big. These dweebs fold skirts twice to make them look like a size 10 but they are actually a size 16. So i go through 20 minutes of these plus size discoveries until i decide , to hell, better the devil you know...i buy a top that can match with my jeans in the digs.
I get home around 9:30, shower and do my toe nails...Scarlet red..nice...thing is, nail polish takes forever to dry and am sleepy so i think to hell and jump under the covers , smudge and all.
I wake up at 5:50 a.m on November 8th 2007 feeling like shit lemme tell you today has been the most awful morning i have had in a long time . And the more i remind myself of the jubilation supposed to be followed by this festive event the angrier i get, i mean it was raining...how?..i have heels on with gold jewelery and a very Small top but noooooo the heavens had to open their flood gates which did nothing for My asthma. I hurriedly scamper to the bus stop thinking, if am early i can get the train and save on bus fare plus traffic. Luckily i make it on time to join the already swelling crowd at the terminal. God then looked down, saw a small stain on my body that perhaps i had missed during my hurried cold shower and decides to fix it...with a downpour of icy rain!
shit!
I ingia a mat in a rash to avoid wetness and asthma. The mat soon leaves even before the train so i reason...yeah! i have saved time...shock on the sister, the train arrives like 5 minutes later and passes me as i am huddled in this stinky metal carriage between school going children and noisy mothers!
I was stuck in traffic from 7a.m to 8:30
Double shit!
By the time i got to Town i was six by products of mad. Still got rained on again...my boyfriend calls me up to wish me Happy birthday and because of my already brooding mood am thinking "whatever"
Get to work every ones assuming you, i log onto messenger no one is on, my heels are killing me, am tired, bila psyche and its only 10 a.m!!!
Triple shit!
POINT: Theres too much pressure put on one day...valentines, birthdays, anniversaries...i think the real moments are the ones not marked in the calendars but those marked by their random awesomeness...wacha hii siku iishe so that we can have many many happy birthdays from tomorrow till November 8th next year!
Monday, 5 November 2007
love is inately a very beautiful thing. I am currently in love by the way and having been in a shitty relationship before, I am honestly thanking God for being in a nice one. I am one of those species, if I like you? that's it...I will do everything I possibly can to ensure you know it often enough. Because of this interesting trait, I suffer from limerence: an involuntary state of mind which seems to result from a romantic attraction for another person combined with an overwhelming obsessive need to have ones feelings reciprocated....yah! it exists
But with time;God and life's bitch slappings, I am learning how to Love without discourse. Coz you see if you love someone, you do so unconditionally, without writing a quotation for payment. It is an awesome thing to love for loves sake. Sure am not stupid, reciprocity is key in every relationship, but if you wanna do or say something coz you feel it, say it now, while you still can. Not because your waiting for their turn ama ur thinking "huyo kijana kananizoea. Jana i bought my dude ice cream and it was nice and he juas he doesnt have to return the favour except just sit , giggle and watch me guzzle down zit fertilizer..lol
POINT:LOVE someone coz you want to, coz you can and coz they need you to...but above all love yourself coz they will, they may not and coz you want them to
(a moment for the deepness)
But with time;God and life's bitch slappings, I am learning how to Love without discourse. Coz you see if you love someone, you do so unconditionally, without writing a quotation for payment. It is an awesome thing to love for loves sake. Sure am not stupid, reciprocity is key in every relationship, but if you wanna do or say something coz you feel it, say it now, while you still can. Not because your waiting for their turn ama ur thinking "huyo kijana kananizoea. Jana i bought my dude ice cream and it was nice and he juas he doesnt have to return the favour except just sit , giggle and watch me guzzle down zit fertilizer..lol
POINT:LOVE someone coz you want to, coz you can and coz they need you to...but above all love yourself coz they will, they may not and coz you want them to
(a moment for the deepness)
I need a Gun to shoot her or a new job...Lord, what will it be?
The title pretty much speaks for itself but before you brand me as delusional, lemme explain
There's this chic I work with. She is honestly impossible to be around and like.
She has this class one tantrums that aggravate you to the point where your eye starts twitching are your thoughts are aligned with the movie rockie balboa
Anyhow
I pride myself in being a very reasonable and patient person( what, coming from a family of 8...you learn a thing or two)
But this chic takes the cake!For no reason whatsoever she's rude... as in your of salimiaring her, she's of lengain or making a snide remark. The thing with her schizophrenia mentalities is that they are random. One day your hot and heavy next you're her enemy , a vicious, venom spitting leprechaun
Arrrggh!
So i started lengain her vibe i mean, u are so not going to pimia for me when i should greet you or not, to hell with that. Thing is, i work at a place where from 1-1:30 , daily, i get to analyse preachings by Joyce Meyer and the whole month she's (Joyce) has been speaking about forgiveness(even when it pains you..) i tried it out once, decided to be the "bigger one" hmmm...I was getting a drink of water at the cooler. she was seated next to it, probably seething from one thing or another. sawa sawa si i say hi
Aaaaaaaaaaaarggggh!
Why did i even bother, the class A bitch( pardon my french Lord but how?)
So i have humbly come to the conclusion that there are some people you cannot live with...you'd rather lick a pavement!
Therefore for all those closet Christians like me, what to do? ignore them and blogg to relieve the strong anxiety to shoot them or resign
;-)
p.s did you know there's a site called toothpastefordinner.com? this ones a wierd one ebu check it out
There's this chic I work with. She is honestly impossible to be around and like.
She has this class one tantrums that aggravate you to the point where your eye starts twitching are your thoughts are aligned with the movie rockie balboa
Anyhow
I pride myself in being a very reasonable and patient person( what, coming from a family of 8...you learn a thing or two)
But this chic takes the cake!For no reason whatsoever she's rude... as in your of salimiaring her, she's of lengain or making a snide remark. The thing with her schizophrenia mentalities is that they are random. One day your hot and heavy next you're her enemy , a vicious, venom spitting leprechaun
Arrrggh!
So i started lengain her vibe i mean, u are so not going to pimia for me when i should greet you or not, to hell with that. Thing is, i work at a place where from 1-1:30 , daily, i get to analyse preachings by Joyce Meyer and the whole month she's (Joyce) has been speaking about forgiveness(even when it pains you..) i tried it out once, decided to be the "bigger one" hmmm...I was getting a drink of water at the cooler. she was seated next to it, probably seething from one thing or another. sawa sawa si i say hi
Aaaaaaaaaaaarggggh!
Why did i even bother, the class A bitch( pardon my french Lord but how?)
So i have humbly come to the conclusion that there are some people you cannot live with...you'd rather lick a pavement!
Therefore for all those closet Christians like me, what to do? ignore them and blogg to relieve the strong anxiety to shoot them or resign
;-)
p.s did you know there's a site called toothpastefordinner.com? this ones a wierd one ebu check it out
women behaving badly
hey hey hey
it is Monday and I am so sad that the weekend came and went that fast , I had a blast and it was all green!
lemme explain
first of all, a lil' street purchasing advice(si u jua hawkers are back with a bang of plastic papers and litter)
anyhoo
so thursday am walking home, trying to concentrate, my vision impaired by the hawkers wares, the people and fatigue from jobo
I come across some tunice ballet pumps and i quickly buy them , i mean they were 200bob, a size 7and a half (blame my dad) and lacy!
wacha i fika digs and discover they are actually pale green instead of white!
wah!
street lights at night lie!
So i took the lime and made lemonade,i wore em on sato with a green rugby top, and strutted my nature wear to the "women behaving badly" concert at the GoDown Art Centre.
It was a blast, met some new crazy people i.e Viola a.k.a....(chic you are a kenyan version of Alias converts...literaly) Naliaka( she came and went with a kick ass poem!about beatin the crap out of some dogging guy) babes, i couldnt help but imagine myself in those karate chop poses bashing my ex...lol
Njeri's poem was an eye opener( enyewe us chics of nairobi tumespoil ;-) and Eudiah! when i grow up i wanna have legs like hers
So twas a blast, after that dundad with my boys, work on sunday, no play today. have an awesome week and whatever time you read this oh dear viewer of my blogg, remember: don't let anybody steal ur joy...the world didnt give it, it sure can't take it away
P.S blogging is turnin out to be more of a plan than i thought hmmm...
it is Monday and I am so sad that the weekend came and went that fast , I had a blast and it was all green!
lemme explain
first of all, a lil' street purchasing advice(si u jua hawkers are back with a bang of plastic papers and litter)
anyhoo
so thursday am walking home, trying to concentrate, my vision impaired by the hawkers wares, the people and fatigue from jobo
I come across some tunice ballet pumps and i quickly buy them , i mean they were 200bob, a size 7and a half (blame my dad) and lacy!
wacha i fika digs and discover they are actually pale green instead of white!
wah!
street lights at night lie!
So i took the lime and made lemonade,i wore em on sato with a green rugby top, and strutted my nature wear to the "women behaving badly" concert at the GoDown Art Centre.
It was a blast, met some new crazy people i.e Viola a.k.a....(chic you are a kenyan version of Alias converts...literaly) Naliaka( she came and went with a kick ass poem!about beatin the crap out of some dogging guy) babes, i couldnt help but imagine myself in those karate chop poses bashing my ex...lol
Njeri's poem was an eye opener( enyewe us chics of nairobi tumespoil ;-) and Eudiah! when i grow up i wanna have legs like hers
So twas a blast, after that dundad with my boys, work on sunday, no play today. have an awesome week and whatever time you read this oh dear viewer of my blogg, remember: don't let anybody steal ur joy...the world didnt give it, it sure can't take it away
P.S blogging is turnin out to be more of a plan than i thought hmmm...
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