Friday, 2 November 2007

Acne Dermatitis Puss Filled Pimples

I was born on 1982
the era of skin lightening creams
am sure you remember them :ambi, Ponds, Oil of Ulay
All which contribute to what I have to say

You see my father is the descendant of Jaramogi the great
Let me explain how that added to my fate
You see my people descended from Southern Sudan
The home of the classic depiction of a tall, wide nosed, gigantic black man
I took my fathers genes from my tummy to my grin
all of which i dont mind especially the skin

I remember it all begun in the mid nineties when i noticed my self
Bracing this young lass to unleash the inner essence that resonates within my rib cage
I grew up with plans and dreams tat were sparked by songs of the era such as "you better work" " i wanna be down with you"
and yes i wanted to be down with this man friend

He had to be the single most fine thing that God could suspend
in front of me at a time when i was oh so ready
to cut loose the ropes that tied him away from him
Then , like superman he appeared, without tights for that was in my imagination
he whispered words of friendship in my ear and i took that ball and ran with it
to the basket ball court, a place where i knew i couldn't fit
But for him, i joined the team so that we could have the same spirit

I did those suicides and dribbled and dribbled
and the closer he got i nibbled and nibbled
at my finger tips so that they could suppress the beat of a heart
Ever so willing ,ever so dreaming, ever so dreaming



I remember it, as clear as day, that era of matatus like shoe world boys and richochet
when men wore plaid shirts and women wore waist coats
when bread was fifteen shillings and Aaliyah was the musical antidote
I remember the bell rung for class and he said we needed to talk
I waited in anticiption as his lips parted and what he said
what he said

all i remember from that time so dark
was him whisper something about me being black

what the hell ladies somebody answer me?

I am black? So what ? So black that you cannot see
The depth of the Cindy in me

It was basically over friendship and basket ball
But it got me thinking about the era of Ambi and all
that
fair and lovely crap
That was when my eyes were opened and I got out of my shell
that's when i noticed the magazines with ladies as light as yellow
As fair as my bone marrow
As pointy as our tainted perception of beauty

That is when i noticed that colours contrast not with my shoes but my face
I saw things more in diamonds and hearts not spades and aces
Disgraces
As chics shy from looking at you in the eye because
they are afraid you will notice the reason why
their make up is hard to find and their pictures rejected from the bill boardsfrom the music videos from the pageant awards
they smile with their teeth yet they are wailing inside
Trying to hide the stinging reality that is not on their side
the one that now determines if you will be the head of an office
or the tea lady, the cover girl, the wife, the receptionist ,the novice

I remember when the sky was literally blacked out
When the sun only rose on off shore beaches
when it was cool to pick on the princess for not being too European
In demeanour and colour
In status and posture,
In fashion and Esteem

I am an African woman
that will never change because of the discovery of colonies
And gloss print
I am so black , it hurt to be yellow or white
I am so dark it has to be lovely

And fair

so be fair to yourself and embrace the wholeness of your tender
soft
hydoquinine free
Melanin packed
Loaded with extra strength to stand up and declare
that I am because

my colour is blind

4 comments:

Judy said...

This is really Great stuff, Congratulations!!! I will definitely keep an eye on this blog. You GO GAL!

Violas Iris said...

Lovely poem and I liked the way you performed it as well. Keep it up!

N.W said...

I said it before and I say it now! I love it. You should perform it kesho during Kwani open mic. I love the fact that you are quite happy with who you are. I feel it for women who spend all their lives and money trying to change their complexion to the ideals of cosmo, true love and the likes. If you can, look for music by Fertile Ground called 'Be Natural' it sort of says what you are but in different words.
Hope to see more of your pieces on this blog.

BekahK said...

Poetry is definitely a way to express yourself without holding back. Words are a written expression of feelings and I could truely understand the frustrations you felt when you wrote it by the words you used. Great job.